#!/usr/bin/perl
##############################################################################
#
#
# ddate - Discordian date
# Version FIVE
#
# This program takes no arguments.  It doesn't take shit from _anyone_.
#
# It returns today's date in the Discordian calendar format.  It also
# tells you if today is a Holyday.
#
# This program is written in perl to maximize the amount of chaos in
# the implementation.  Kallisti (K) 1993, Screaming Lizard Propulsion
# Systems.  All rights reversed.  Mess with this program.  Call it your
# own.  Hail Eris.  -><-
#
#                       Hugs and Kisses,
#                       Reverend I. C. Puckett, Durham Discordian Glee Club
#                       Prince of the Southern Provinces
#
#
##############################################################################

# Set the century.  If you don't know what the current century is,
# ask your system administrator.
$century = 1900;

# Say, how 'bout them month things?
@days_in_the_months = (31, 28, 31, 30, 31, 30, 31, 31, 30, 31, 30, 31);

# Use the groovy perl time interface.
($sec,$min,$hour,$mday,$mon,$year,$wday,$yday,$isdst) = localtime;

# Fix the screwed up results from the groovy perl time interface.
$mon++;
$year += $century;

# And convert to Discordian calendar.
@greyface_date = ($mday, $mon, $year);
@discordian_date = do convert_date(@greyface_date);

# Print the result.
do print_discordian_date(@discordian_date);

# To run a self-test of all the days in the year, set this bad boy
# true.
if (4==5) {
    print "\nTesting...\n";
    for ($month = 1; $month <= 12; $month++) {
	for ($day = 1; $day <= @days_in_the_months[$month-1]; $day++) {
	    do print_discordian_date(do convert_date(($day,$month,1992)));
	    # Test St. Tib's day
	    if (($day == 28) && ($month == 2)) {
		do print_discordian_date(do convert_date((29,2,1992)));
	    }
	}
    }
}
	    
sub convert_date {
    local($gday, $gmon, $gyear) = @_;
    local($dweekday, $dday, $dseason, $dyear) = (-5, -5, -5, -5);
    local($fnord);

    # Figure out the correct year.  Easy peasy.
    $dyear = $gyear + 1166;

    # Now what day of the year is this?
    local($day_of_year) = $gday;
    for (1 .. ($gmon - 1)) {
	$day_of_year += @days_in_the_months[$_ - 1];
    }

######    print "Day of year:  $day_of_year\n";

    # What season is it?  Seasons are seventy-three days long.  There
    # are _five_ seasons in a year.  Seven minus three is four, which is
    # two squared.  Take one of those twos, and add it to the three:
    # you get _five_.  Take the other two, subtract it from the seven:
    # you get _five_.
    $dseason = int(($day_of_year-1) / 73) + 1;

    if (($gmon == 2) && ($gday == 29))
    {
	# Happy St. Tib's day!  Time for Jello (tm).
	$dweekday = 0;
	$dday = 0;
    }
    else
    {
	# St. Tib will have to wait.
	$dweekday = (($day_of_year - 1) % 5) + 1;
	$dday = (($day_of_year - 1) % 73) + 1;
    }

    return ($dweekday, $dday, $dseason, $dyear);
}

sub print_discordian_date {
    local ($dweekday, $dday, $dseason, $dyear);
    $dweekday = (
		 "Saint Tib's Day",
		 "Sweetmorn",
		 "Boomtime",
		 "Pungenday",
		 "Prickle-Prickle",
		 "Setting Orange",
		 )[@_[0]];
    if (@_[1] == 0)
    {
	$dday = "between 59 and 60";
    }
    else
    {
	$dday = @_[1];
    }

    $dseason = (
	     "Chaos",
	     "Discord",
	     "Confusion",
	     "Bureaucracy",
	     "The Aftermath",
	     )[@_[2] - 1];
    $dyear = @_[3];
    
    print "Today is $dweekday, day $dday in the season of $dseason, $dyear.\n";
######    print "\t@_[0]\t@_[1]\t@_[2]\t@_[3]\n";

    # Handle the Apostle Holydays.  Rejoice rejoice.  Whee.
    if ($dday == 5)		# is today a holy day?  huh?
    {
	local($aholyday)=(
			  "Mungday",
			  "Mojoday",
			  "Syaday",
			  "Zaraday",
			  "Maladay",
			  )[@_[2] - 1];
	print "It is the sacred Apostle Holyday of $aholyday.\n";
    }

    # Handle the Season Holydays.  The crowd goes wild.  Who celebrates
    # these things anyway?
    if ($dday == 50)		# is today a holy day?  huh?
    {
	local($sholyday)=(
			  "Chaoflux",
			  "Discoflux",
			  "Confuflux",
			  "Bureflux",
			  "Afflux",
			  )[@_[2] - 1];
	print "It is the sacred Season Holyday of $sholyday.\n";
    }
}

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#                  YOU MAY NOW SAFELY DESTROY YOUR COMPUTER                   #
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